Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Birth Control - Christian or not?

As I am 17 weeks pregnant with my 4th (and probably final) child, I am coming to a point where I am questioning some of my belief systems from the past.
I've always just accepted that birth control was ok and really no big deal to God one way or another. Matter of fact, I've been on birth control off and on since shortly before I married. Again, I have never really thought much about it. Everybody does it. Everyone decides how many children they want and then do what it takes to keep it that way.
I thought I had this all figured out. Actually, I was just blindly following those who've told me it was ok in the past and have never really met too many folks who disagreed.
I figured we would get to the end of having the number of children that we wanted in our family and then hubs would go and have a little surgery and that would be that.

But, as that gets closer to being a reality in my life, I have begun to wonder where did I really get these beliefs?

What does the bible have to say about birth control?

Since God is sovereign, shouldn't HE be in charge of the number of children we have instead of us controlling it in any way?

But then, since God is sovereign, isn't He bigger than birth control anyway and if he decides we will have more kids, then we will- right?

And a myriad of other questions following the same line of thinking! SO, that's the question girls!
What are your thoughts on birth control as Christians and how does it line up biblically?

I'd love all the help I can get while I am working through this issue in my life!
Thanks everybody!


elaine said...

A good question to ponder. As a mother of 4 kids, I can relate with your angst. I recently blogged about the topic of when life begins entitled "Beyond Zero"...but this manipulation of creating life...I'm afraid I'll have to give that some more thought. I can tell you, however, that I am glad we stopped at 4!

Thanks for the question.

Karen said...

First, I wanted to tell you that I am so glad you are joining me for the book study for "Lies Women Believe." Please come by my blog to read the new update on the book study. We will begin this Monday. The details are in the post.

Second, the question you pose is a highly debated one. It's one I've also struggled with. I have come to a conclusion on the matter. Yet, I'll not go into my thoughts on the issue just yet because interestingly enough, this very issue is one of the many issues we will deal with in the book study for "Lies Women Believe." I look forward to our many upcoming discussions during our study!

Hope you have a great day!

Linda said...

Takes a brave woman to face this question, Mindy. I always think (not proclaiming to have "THE" answer here) that if it's not in black and white in the Bible, you have to go by staying in line with God's character as best as you know him. You are his lamb; he knows you and you know his voice. He will tell you. Good for you for posing the question in the first place. Many people don't even think it over.

Valarie said...

My, my, my girl. Deep stuff! I love it!

Well, I've battled with this question myself. I have lupus and that USUALLY causes infertility, however I think it had a reverse reaction on me. I got pregnant on the pill twice, with an IUD in place and one year POST-vasectomy!! I have 3 living children and 2 waiting for me in heaven. After the incident with the IUD I really began questioning birth control. I had trusted my Dr's and not really done the research I should've with the IUD. I didn't realized it prevented FERTILIZED eggs from attaching - I know, I'm a dork - but anyway, after that I really took a good look at birth control.

Since so many methods hadn't worked, I did end up having a tubal ligation (actually my Dr. put double clamps on them because I'm SOOO fertile) and even then struggled with that decision, but really my body couldn't take much more.

I know that my situation isn't the "norm" but it has been a topic that I've spent alot of time with the Father about. I know He is Sovereign and He has plans for all of us and our kids, and I know that He has forgiven my choices in the past that needed forgiving and He knows my heart in the decision for the birth control I've made now. That's about the best I can do. That's what I have to live with. I hope this wasn't all just TMI but it is a GREAT question! Thanks for bringing it up!!!

SharonB said...

Mindy~ The Word says that children are a blessing. Who wouldn't want a blessing from God? Even if it meant more than I thought I wanted!

Humm...Honestly I don't have an answer for you. After two my husband said he really didn't want anymore and I agreed. So off he went to make sure.

Almost 22 yrs later I can tell you I have spent many years regretting that decision. I wanted at least one more, maybe more. But God IS soveriegn right!

My best advice is for you and your husband to seek the Lord together and make a decision based on what God reveals to you.

Oh btw, I came to your site by way of Kelli...nothing like jumping in on my first visit!!

Bella said...

It is a hard first thought was...I used BC to not get pregnant for my own selfish reasons (no money, too young, yada-yada)...BUT I have 4 boys, the first and last were not planned, by my hubby or me anyway...hmmm, I'll have to dig deeper on this.

Karen said...

Hi Mindy! I have posted some information for the book study on "Lies Women Believe." Please go to the following link:

This is just some general information for anyone wanting to participate. I'm excited to begin on Monday. I look forward to our discussions!

Take care,

Ginger said...

I have thought about this a lot over the past week. One thing I have learned from Priscilla Shirer's "Discerning the Voice of God" study is very similar to what Linda said above. If it isn't black & white in the Bible - which I do not think this is - we have to take it to God & see what He reveals. Another thing I learned is when He does reveal His plan to us (on things that are not black & white in the Bible), they are right for us & may not be right for everyone else. Everyone has to take issues like these to God & wait for His answer for them. Make sense?
I hope so & I hope this helps. I'm perfectly fine with you continuing to give me BEAUTIFUL, WONDERFUL nieces (and maybe a nephew in the near future)! :)

Cz said...

thanks for the great point Ginger. everyone is admitting what a tough question this is, which usually means there won't be a simple answer.

'lies women believe' is such an excellent study, and i still quote much of it. but nancy's chapter on this question is a bit polarizing. (just a little warning for those of you beginning the study!)

my parent's church believes in no BC, but my dad is quick to point out that God gives specific messages and lessons to individual churches, as well as individual people. Abraham was asked to sacrifice his son, but Jacob was not asked to sacrifice a son. Didn't Jacob need to learn unconditional obedience like Abraham? Sure. But God was teaching Jacob hard lessons about favoritism instead.

there is no 'one size fits all answer' except Ginger's: "take issues like these to God and wait for His answer for them."!!