"Faith never knows where it is being led, but it loves and knows the One who is leading."
~ Oswald Chambers ~
Wow. What a quote. It has taken me years to become one who can handle a quote like this. Years to really comprehend it's reality. Years to fully believe that GOD is in control and understand that HE is truly leading my life.
It is easy to SAY it. "God is in control and he is leading my life". It is much harder, In my opinion, to FULLY believe it.
When I was younger I didn't understand this and thought (for various reasons) that God couldn't possibly be really involved in my life. Even though I grew up in church and was there almost every Sunday, and I heard it said that God was in control - it was hard to believe. OH, I heard it over and over and I knew all the bible stories that should have made it a reality for me. In fact, when I was in our youth group and we would have Bible Trivia tournaments, I was the girl everyone wanted on their team because I knew all the answers........(I need to mention that we played with the kids cards not the adult ones......most of those are still too hard!) I could tell you all the answers but it was hard for me to really have FAITH as in this quote.
Now, almost 20 years later, I still have struggles with faith. But I have come a long way. I can look back at my life and see God's workings in my life and see where HE has been in charge even when I was stupid enough to be playing god of my own life.
I've said in previous posts that as a child I was sexually abused by a care giver. Having innocence lost at such an early age - and feeling like it was really my own fault that this happened to me, led me to some destructive behavior in my early 20's. I was very promiscuous - I'm very ashamed to say. And never once did I have a scare of pregnancy in my stupidity. I don't say this to brag -- I say this to drive home my point that GOD was FULLY in charge of my life. See, once I got married and hubby and started trying to have children, it literally happened the 1st month we didn't use birth control. The second time was exactly the same and the third time? We were still using birth control. SO - looking back now, I can fully see how God was in control. Pregnancy for me came easy and when I think of my foolishness in those years, I should have had the consequences of an "unwanted" pregnancy to deal with. BUT PRAISE be to the father, he spared me this consequence.
I have learned so much to really trust God in this past year and fully see him as IN CHARGE of life -- all life. And as far as the "not knowing where it is being led" part -- I am living it right now. We've been led to a new place and there is much to be done in this place. I am learning to stop worrying about the WHERE and just to fully trust and allow the ONE I love to lead the way. Hubby and I were just talking about this a couple of nights ago. We really want to be God's hands in our situation and to do that we have to be fully IN TUNE with him.
This is an awesome quote and one that I am still learning to make a reality in my life. I am thankful for where HE has led me thus for and for the understanding he has given me. And as hard as it may be, I fully in tend to stop worrying and the where and remember that I know and LOVE the one who is leading. And to remember that HE is sovereign and loves me too and HIS leading can NEVER be wrong!
If you want to read more thoughts on this or want to leave your own go on over to Sting My Heart!